- it takes 3 people to get your dog on the scale at the vets.

- you walk your dog and everyone knows him by name, but you have no idea who these people are.

- you own a dog capable of pulling someone from a porta potty.

- your dog can hide an entire tennis ball (among other things) fully inside his lips and give you that innocent look that says, "What? I'm not eating anything!"

- you carry a tape measure with you when shopping for a new vehicle.

- you keep at least one colorcoded "drool towel" in every room of yourhouse.

- after banishing your husband, the snoring in your bedroom still keeps you awake.

- you are hiking with a friend who later suggests that you ought to have an environmental impact statement done on your dog.

- you toss your dog a ball and cringe when he almost hits his head on the top of the doorway.

- you take your dog for a ride and he rests his head on your arm, causing you to make random right turns.

- you have given up on water dishes and you just use the bathtub.

- your two dogs decide to play in the house, and they end up pulling the ceiling fan down for the second time.

- you have to move over when brushing your teeth because your dog wantsa drink.

- you show a picture of your dogs and kids together, and the first person you point out is your dog.

- while stopped at a stop light, everyone stares as your car rocks back and forth because the dog is panting out the window.

- you go to vacuum your car and most of the fur is up there on theceiling.

- the monthly dog budget exceeds your home mortgage payment.

- your veterinarian has been able to put in a swimming pool, build a large home, buy jet skis and a personal plan.

- you have had to train your dog not to lick dishes, and the dishes are in the sink.

- the donuts you put on top of the refrigerator are gone when you get home and your dog has powdered sugar on his nose.

- your dog can see what you're cooking, and he tries to assist you in the preparation.

- you're holding him straddled between your legs when the doorbell rings, and you find yourself quickly transported straight to the frontdoor.

- the pizza delivery people arrange to meet you at the end of thesidewalk.

- your dog stands in your lap and reaches over you to stick his head in the drive-through window at McDonald's and nearly gives the cashier a heart attack when she turns around to give you your change.

- you purchase a large screen TV and you still can't see the program when he stands in front of the television.